Hey folks! Having problems staying awake in your 12-hour day of drudgery for pennies on the dollar just to watch your fat cat corporate bosses get rich off the fruits of your labor?
Well you're in luck!
Considering that our friendly, socially aware, and morally conscious federal government has decided to cut spending on fighting methamphetamine production--YOU can score a few tons of the crap to keep you up for weeks--For nothing but your entire lifetime income!
Today is the first day of the rest of your life.
Ahhh...isn't the American Dream just grand?
May this not be the fate of all Daryl Krogen's nationwide from this day forward.