Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Ladies and Fentlemen, Jesus has left the building...

...or rather, I've left the two shopping carts and plastic covering that I refer to as my "building" and have entered an actual building known as a "public library." So in reality, I, Jesus, have "entered" the building, not "left" as I previously stated...though I will be leaving soon since the workers here leer at me with disgust and dismay.

It isn't my fault that public libraries are "public," i.e., "free" for anyone. Though since I don't have an address they might say that I don't qualify for the residency requirements for the library, but there is a community P.O. Box at the shelter that allows us to apply for jobs and other activities and services that require a valid address. Beforehand, I would just use the library's address, because let's be honest, who uses "mail" these days anyway. Even Obama said recently that "Fed-Ex and UPS...they're doing great. It's the Post Office that's always having problems."

Thank God there's a T.V. at the shelter, or else I'd have to go back to stealing newspapers and evesdropping on conversations, which you can imagine is difficult for a homeless person due to our distinct characteristics that include (but are not limited to): offensive odor; dirty and/or tattered clothing; basket of misc. seemingly useless objects parked outside of said library; tendency to talk loudly to oneself and/or others.

1 comment:

  1. Holy chit.

    Does no one care about my plight? Why GOD, WHY??!!


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